Ethiopian Feminism: Kolla Women Liberation Collective defies Harem Culture

Kolla Women Liberation Collective is a group of young women in Ethiopia who fled their matrimonial homes and divorced their husbands, in their defiant fight against the harem culture of their society. Their director, Amara Tesfaye, answered my questions below:

Question: What is “harem culture?”

Amara Tesfaye: Harem culture is when women in our culture are married off to a man and are kept in the husband’s house and not permitted to interact with other people. They aren’t allowed to work, or seek education, health care, art, entertainment, sports and other physical activities. They are totally taken away from contact from the outside world. They are not allowed any purpose. They exist solely for the satisfaction of their husband.

Question: Can you tell me two examples of women who left their husbands?

Amara Tesfaye: For me, I was married off to a Salafi cleric when I was 18 years old, against my wishes,  My husband leads a local mosque. He is the most insecure man I have ever known. He insisted I not step outside of our home. I was not allowed to participate in women’s community meetings, or take my daughters to schools, or borrow a book from the library or even visit my parents. The wicked action that finally broke the camel’s back for me was him preventing me from visiting a hospital when I was sick, because the doctor who might attend to me was a man. His insecurity stems from Islamic views on gender mixing. I realized his keeping me from the hospital puts my life and the lives of my two daughters at risk, so I left the marriage, with my daughters, to start my life over in liberty so I can protect my daughters and raise them to be free people who can think for themselves. 

My friend Jamila: her husband had three wives, all were confined in a small house and they all wore the burqa. It was a household that reeked of poverty, the husband was incapacitated, unable to provide for a single wife let alone three women with many children and on top of all of this he beats people in his household over disagreements, his is in accordance with Qur'anic verses that say it is all right to beat your wife to correct her. Jamila wanted employment or to learn a skill to make money but all her efforts were met with harsh resistance and hard beatings. The beating was getting too much until Jamila found it no longer bearable so she ran away with the children.  

Question: Your group practices mutual aid to help everyone survive?

Aymara Tesfaye: Our group helps women who escape harem culture. We share our small apartments with new escapees, we share food with them and we teach them vocational skills. Being collective is our greatest strength, we look out for each other and help each other whenever necessary.  

Question: Are many women joining your efforts?

Aymara Tesfaye: We are witnessing an increase in numbers of women joining us. With time, we hope to create a safe house that can cater to the needs of the desperate and needy escapees of harem culture.

Question: Do men oppose your ideas?

Aymara Tesfaye: Men are totally opposed to what we do, they regard our dissent and our way of life as defiance, and irreligious to God’s law. They do not believe in a world of women’s equality and opportunity. Men believe it is their duty to control our lives and tell us what to do. When we oppose that, they consider us disbelievers, westernized and possessed. 

Question: How is the group organized?

Aymara Tesfaye: Our women’s rescue group has always operated and helped each other communally. Before HuMAN, our source of funding was a contributive system where every member pays a small fee from their earnings doing menial jobs, working on tea farms and trading in the market. This money is put into a general purse which is used for the welfare of all members who have difficult situations.

We also use this money to help settle new escapees from harem culture who join us.  We register their name and talk to them about safety. If their husbands are chasing them (some husbands find it incredibly hard when their wife leaves), we just give them money to escape further north, we do not keep them or tell them to stay. We want to be sure they are out of reach of their husband.

If they are not at risk from their ex-husband, we accept them, we find them a house to stay and we raise money for them to start trading, or, if they want to work on farms, we help find opportunities until they gainfully employed. We have meetings the first Wednesday of the month where we discuss and address pressing issues and check up on each other.